♠ Free bird ♠

Alone in the alley behind Valhalla, Noddy unwrapped the package. A simple bacon sandwich. Crispy bacon. His favourite. But the lipstick kiss on the serviette meant more to him than the food.

No, Dirk didn’t make this.

He tucked the serviette into the side pocket of his jacket and leaned against the wall under a neon sign to enjoy his bacon and beer, idly reading the words of the prophets written on the wall in front of him.

A blur of motion and a squawk announced that he had company. Spike had landed on his head, flapping his wings in greeting. Or maybe it was hunger.

“Good morning, cheeky bird.”

Spike hopped off his head, onto his shoulder, then down his arm till he was as close to the sandwich as he could get without being rude.

“Okay, alright, you can have some.”

The tiniest sliver of bacon was all it took. Noddy broke it off, Spike took it with his beak then wrapped his ancient claw around it, and they both chewed in contented silence for a while.

“You don’t need money, do you?” This was Noddy asking the question. Not Spike. “Why are you still here? In this shithole? Don’t you ever want to fly away and start over?”

He broke off another piece of bacon, holding it between his fingers for the brief moment it took the bird to snatch it.

“We need money, Spike. We have to get out of here. Before it’s too late.”

Spike tilted his head and squawked in sympathy.

Or maybe it was hunger.

Read Dancing in Valhalla in weekly installments on FaceBook or WordPress. Receive notifications via Twitter, Tumblr, Instagram, GoodReads, or Amazon.

Download free sampler previews of all my books, and some complete short stories, from PCloud.

No charge. No obligation. No sign-in. Read for free. Share with your friends.

Physical paperback copies are available from BookDealers of Rivonia – 40 Wessel Road, Rivonia, Sandton.

Also available from Curiosity in Pretoria.

From Book Circle Capital in 27 Boxes, Melville.

And Hard Money, my book on personal finance, is available from ZaBazaar, supported by the Department of Sports, Arts and Culture.

What happens when reality TV ventures out into space and awakens ancient gods who would really rather be left alone?

Watch the human race tear itself apart in the face of cosmic forces unleashed after millennia.

Let Sleeping Gods Lie – my new science-fiction horror novelette – is available on Amazon and various other online retailers. I have some paperback copies if anybody wants one, or you can find them at Curiosity, in the Railways Cafe.

Finally, catch Big Day Out, a mad mercenary romp through the dystopian nightmare that Covid-19 might have become. Might still become, if we don’t keep our self-appointed leaders on a very short leash.

Available on Amazon, from BookDealers of Rivonia, or from Book Circle Capital.

www.amazon.com/dp/B08BKRQHG2

FREE on Kindle Unlimited till the 28th, after which the book launches across all other online retailers.

Cheers.

Roll me away

The sound of a beer can being opened next to one’s ear usually grabs one’s attention. Especially when the accompanying ice-cold spray shoots directly into said ear.

Noddy shot upright, rolling to his left. Fortunately, this meant he avoided smacking his face against the vicious-looking contraption hanging just above his sleeping head. Unfortunately, it meant he fell off the edge of the pool table and landed unceremoniously on the floor of Valhalla. The nightclub, not the mythological Viking hall.

Roars of laughter showed that his acrobatics had been positively received by an appreciative audience. And when the cold beer was pressed into his hand, he shook his head and managed to focus on the source of the hilarity.

“Told you he’d miss the light-shade.” Dirk took his winnings from one of the bouncers. “Thought you were dead, old son.”

Noddy’s head and stomach pointed out, in no uncertain terms, that they wished this was the case. Noddy ignored their screams of protest and used the edge of the pool table to push himself to his feet. It goes without saying that he didn’t spill a drop of his liquid breakfast.

Dirk pointed to a bundle wrapped in tin-foil, sitting lonely on top of the bar. “I didn’t make that,” was his only comment. “Make sure the door locks behind you when you leave. Some of us have shit to do, make out?”

Read Dancing in Valhalla in weekly installments on FaceBook or WordPress. Receive notifications via Twitter, Tumblr, Instagram, GoodReads, or Amazon.

Download free sampler previews of all my books, and some complete short stories, from PCloud.

No charge. No obligation. No sign-in. Read for free. Share with your friends.

Physical paperback copies are available from BookDealers of Rivonia – 40 Wessel Road, Rivonia, Sandton. 30% off all books from 11 to 13 September. Get an extra 5% off if you wear a burning rose (or any item of clothing with a floral theme).

Also available from Curiosity in Pretoria.

From Book Circle Capital in 27 Boxes, Melville.

And Hard Money is available from ZaBazaar, supported by the Department of Sports, Arts and Culture.

What happens when reality TV ventures out into space and awakens ancient gods who would really rather be left alone?

Watch the human race tear itself apart in the face of cosmic forces unleashed after millennia.

Let Sleeping Gods Lie – my new science-fiction horror novelette – is available on Amazon and various other online retailers. I have some paperback copies if anybody wants one, or you can find them at Curiosity, in the Railways Cafe.

Finally, catch Big Day Out, a mad mercenary romp through the dystopian nightmare that Covid-19 might have become. Might still become, if we don’t keep our self-appointed leaders on a very short leash.

Available on Amazon, from BookDealers of Rivonia, or from Book Circle Capital.

FREE on Amazon from today till the 24th of September. www.amazon.com/dp/B08BKRQHG2

Also FREE on Kindle Unlimited till the 28th, after which the book launches across all other online retailers.

Cheers.

Fire water burn

Janine appeared back behind the counter, handing Morag a drink.

“Thanks, love.” She winked at Noddy. “You’re not thinking of visiting him, surely?”

Janine scowled. “I see. Now everybody wants to know my business and tell me what to do?”

Morag held up her hands. “Sorry. My bad. Forget I said anything.”

The blonde leaned on the counter, letting the tension drain from her shoulders. “No, I’m sorry. I was out of line. It’s just… I don’t know what to do, you know? Mick’s not as bad as everyone thinks.” She looked up in time to see the look that crossed Morag’s face. “He’s not. Really. Maybe he was, once, but not anymore. Everyone changes, Morag. Everyone grows up eventually.”

Her words were directed at Morag, but her eyes had strayed to the profile of her boyfriend who was stubbornly watching the bass player twiddle knobs on his amplifier.

“Don’t go.” Noddy didn’t turn his head, but his words were still clear.

Dirk came at them across the dancefloor. “Janine…”

But she had grabbed a tray and was already moving in the other direction.

“Hello Valhalla.”

Jamie stood centre-stage, a bottle of Jack in one hand, his microphone in the other. “Let’s see everyone down at the front for this next song.” He cracked the seal on the bottle, tossed the cap into the crowd and took the first sip. “Come on down, fill my Voodoo Soul.”

Noddy took a step closer. He was already at the front of the stage, foot up, head down. But he needed to be closer.

Jamie saw him approach and reached down with the bottle. “Cheers, brother.”

Noddy took the bottle with one hand, finished the beer in his other hand and chased it with a shot of Jack. He saw Dirk at the bar, waving his hands in animated frustration, Janine shrugging and shaking her head.

The crowd pressed around Noddy, impatient, eager to participate in the time-honoured ritual. Still watching the bar, Noddy raised the bottle to his lips and let the firewater flow.

Read Dancing in Valhalla in weekly installments on FaceBook or WordPress. Receive notifications via Twitter, Tumblr, Instagram, GoodReads, or Amazon.

Download free sampler previews of all my books, and some complete short stories, from PCloud.

No charge. No obligation. No sign-in. Read for free. Share with your friends.

Physical paperback copies are available from BookDealers of Rivonia – 40 Wessel Road, Rivonia, Sandton. 30% off all books from 11 to 13 September. Get an extra 5% off if you wear a burning rose (or any item of clothing with a floral theme).

Also available from Curiosity in Pretoria.

From Book Circle Capital in 27 Boxes, Melville.

And Hard Money is available from ZaBazaar, supported by the Department of Sports, Arts and Culture.

What happens when reality TV ventures out into space and awakens ancient gods who would really rather be left alone?

Watch the human race tear itself apart in the face of cosmic forces unleashed after millennia.

Let Sleeping Gods Lie – my new science-fiction horror novelette – is available on Amazon and various other online retailers. I have some paperback copies if anybody wants one, or you can find them at Curiosity, in the Railways Cafe.

Finally, catch Big Day Out, a mad mercenary romp through the dystopian nightmare that Covid-19 might have become. Might still become, if we don’t keep our self-appointed leaders on a very short leash.

Available on Amazon, from BookDealers of Rivonia, or from Book Circle Capital.

Cheers.

Voodoo soul

There was no question what the crowd had come to hear. Southern rock. Done the Jasper Dan way.

The band were setting up. Noddy watched Daz play with the feedback from his guitar amp, getting the sound just right.

“She has to go, boet. You know what he’s like. I don’t want to have to deal with the kak if she doesn’t turn up.”

Noddy tried to focus on the stage. Tune out everything else. Especially Dirk. He reached absently for his beer, but found that it was empty.

“Not happening, boss man.” Janine slid a fresh drink into her boyfriend’s hand and grabbed the empty bottle without pausing on her way across the club.

“Aw, come on, Janine.” Dirk chased after her. “One visit. Just say hello. Put his mind at ease.”

Noddy couldn’t hear the rest of the conversation. Daz had started a solo, fine-tuning each string before the rest of the band joined him.

“She’s not going, is she?” Morag slid onto the stool next to him.

Noddy gave up on the stage. It was only a sound-check. “I don’t know. She has her own mind. Makes her own decisions. She won’t listen to me.”

“Or to Dirk, I hope. I wouldn’t go see him. You know what he’s like.”

Noddy turned to face her. “That’s what everyone keeps saying. But she doesn’t know, does she? I mean, she thinks he’s just another guy in the club. Bit rough around the edges, maybe, but with a heart of gold.”

Morag nodded. “Look, he was different around her, I’ll admit. For a while, he almost became a better person. He even got her that job at the print shop.”

“What? I didn’t know that.”

Morag shrugged. “You weren’t paying much attention to anything at the time, except Dirk’s bar stock. She changed you, too. Shit, she changes everybody. Maybe I should date her next.”

Noddy smiled and closed his eyes.

“Stop trying to see that in your head. It’s not actually going to happen.”

Read Dancing in Valhalla in weekly installments on FaceBook or WordPress. Receive notifications via Twitter, Tumblr, Instagram, GoodReads, or Amazon.

Download free sampler previews of all my books, and some complete short stories, from PCloud.

No charge. No obligation. No sign-in. Read for free. Share with your friends.

Physical paperback copies are available from BookDealers of Rivonia – 40 Wessel Road, Rivonia, Sandton. 30% off all books from 11 to 13 September. Get an extra 5% off if you wear a burning rose (or any item of clothing with a floral theme).

Also available from Curiosity in Pretoria.

From Book Circle Capital in 27 Boxes, Melville.

And Shorty’s Poems and Hard Money are now available from ZaBazaar, supported by the Department of Sports, Arts and Culture.

What happens when reality TV ventures out into space and awakens ancient gods who would really rather be left alone?

Watch the human race tear itself apart in the face of cosmic forces unleashed after millennia.

Let Sleeping Gods Lie – my new science-fiction horror novelette – is available on Amazon and various other online retailers. I have some paperback copies if anybody wants one, or you can find them at Curiosity, in the Railways Cafe.

Finally, catch Big Day Out, a mad mercenary romp through the dystopian nightmare that Covid-19 might have become. Might still become, if we don’t keep our self-appointed leaders on a very short leash.

Available on Amazon, from BookDealers of Rivonia, or from Book Circle Capital.

Cheers.

I wish you were a beer

Sundays were relatively quiet in Valhalla, but only in the sense that fewer people had been known to end up dead or in hospital. Statistically speaking.

That didn’t mean the club itself was dead. On the contrary. In fact, this particular Sunday night crowd might have been even larger – if less unruly – than the Saturday night zoo.

Noddy was at the bar. The band wasn’t on stage yet, so where else would he be? Janine stood across from him, a solid metre of polished mahogany separating them.

“I won’t visit him in hospital. I don’t care what Dirk says. I just won’t.” She carried on pouring shots of caramel vodka into glasses lined up on a tray in front of her. “He can think what he likes. They both can.”

“It’s still a bad idea, Girlfriend. Bad bad bad. He’s a raving psychopath. He’s three mental illnesses stacked on top of one another, wrapped in a black leather trench coat. What happens when he finds out the truth? When he remembers? He’ll snap. You know what he’s like.”

“I’m more worried about what he’ll do to himself right now. Dirk said he was really serious about me being the only good thing he’s ever had in his life. His only reason for coming back from the dead.”

Noddy snorted. “It’s not like he’s making the world a better place by coming back, is it?”

Janine gave him The Look. One eyebrow shot up, and she uttered the dreaded word, feared the world over by men and beasts alike. “Really?”

“I’m just saying… He hit you. Shit, he hits everyone. I won’t let him hurt you again, Girlfriend.”

Janine laughed. “He wasn’t that bad. Not to me. But I won’t let him hurt me again either. Don’t worry about it. He’s behind us now.”

“Can’t we just leave? Go down to the coast, get away from all of this, start over, together, before he gets out?”

“We talked about this. Remember? The print shop has had a good year. The boss is looking at maybe paying bonuses next month. We need that money to survive down at the coast, until we both,“ she raised a finger and pointed meaningfully, “yes, both, find a decent job.”

Noddy reached for one of the vodka shots. Janine sighed.

“You know, alcohol is not always the answer.”

Noddy shrugged as he tossed it back.

“Girlfriend, you’re obviously not asking the right questions.”

Read Dancing in Valhalla in weekly installments on FaceBook or WordPress. Receive notifications via Twitter, Tumblr, Instagram, GoodReads, or Amazon.

Download free sampler previews of all my books, and some complete short stories, from PCloud.

No charge. No obligation. No sign-in. Read for free. Share with your friends.

Physical paperback copies are available from BookDealers of Rivonia – 40 Wessel Road, Rivonia, Sandton.

From Curiosity in Pretoria.

From Book Circle Capital in 27 Boxes, Melville.

And Shorty’s Poems and Hard Money are now available from ZaBazaar, supported by the Department of Sports, Arts and Culture.

What happens when reality TV ventures out into space and awakens ancient gods who would really rather be left alone?

Watch the human race tear itself apart in the face of cosmic forces unleashed after millennia.

Let Sleeping Gods Lie – my new science-fiction horror novelette – is available on Amazon and various other online retailers. I have some paperback copies if anybody wants one, or you can find them at Curiosity, in the Railways Cafe.

Finally, catch Big Day Out, a mad mercenary romp through the dystopian nightmare that Covid-19 might have become. Might still become, if we don’t keep our self-appointed leaders on a very short leash.

Available on Amazon, from BookDealers of Rivonia, or from Book Circle Capital.

Cheers.